Teddy's sticks to the classics, with bottomless mimosas and (if you must) Bloody Marys, though they fortunately go off-script by at least offering a cranberry juice option. The champagne ratio is admirable, and our waiter provided refills so consistently (until exactly the 2-hour mark) that it was only their noticing an empty glass that allowed us to continue to order the also-bottomless-food -- but we'll get to that.

If you're wondering why we failed to snag any photos of our food, it's because we were too busy happily inhaling it, but come prepared for your stomach (and mind) to be confused whether the food selections are a la carte, bottomless, or at a customizable station. You'll want for nothing, but spend more time than you'd like navigating how to divide your portions among a full menu and separate omelette and waffle bars.

The most challenging part of this all-you-can-eat brunch was that neither the servers nor the establishment itself seemed to know that was the case -- our waiter, while friendly, always seemed surprised when we ordered another round of plates, and between the menu saying sliders and our table full of brunchers, we didn't expect to have to determine how to portion out a single tiny (admittedly delicious!) burger.

The bright side of the food maze is you'll get your steps in trying to find the waffle bar, which gives you an opportunity to appreciate the incredible decor honoring, you guessed it, Teddy Roosevelt. Between the charming wood paneling, comfortable leather chairs, and inspirational quotes from our 26th President, you'll find yourself in a unique DC presidential experience, mimosa in hand.